Children Need Their Dads

I have worked with young people for a long time. There is a role that Dads play which is irreplaceable. When Dads are absent from their traditional place in families, those families suffer.

Sons need their dads. They need to see how to behave as a man. One of my favorite scenes from Gran Torino is when Walt tries to teach Thao how to talk like a man. This isn’t for the faint of heart. He does also try to teach him how to cuss properly. But really, he wants Thao to learn how to behave as a man when applying for a job and while working in construction. Thao needed Walt to grow up. Walt needed Thao to show him how to respect people of other cultures. It is a beautiful movie.

Daughters need their dads. They need to see real strength. A respected friend of mine said, “Women don’t just need someone who is willing to load the dishwasher. They need someone who is strong enough to lead and protect their household. Anyone can load a dishwasher. We need men to lead their families.” Daughters need to see this. Dads give them strength. They teach them to be strong. Daughters need dads to watch out for them, and protect them from men who don’t have their best interest at heart.

More than anything as parents, we are called to teach our children right from wrong. Most importantly, we are to show them the way to the altar where God laid his son at Golgotha. Our children need to know God. Above all else, they need to be guided in His direction.

Our society is suffering mightily due to the missing presence of dads. It is never too late. Maybe you feel like that it’s just too late to matter. It is never too late. Hear me on this. It is never too late. I was blessed with a great dad. His presence shaped me into the person that I am today. Be that person in your child’s life.

And especially if you are a male teacher or admin, you need to be a strong male role model for your students. Don’t be afraid to talk about your hobbies. Kids love to hear about sports, fishing, video game playing, stories about how you grew up, you name it. Many students don’t have a dad in their lives. You might be the only male role model they ever see.

it is important to remember that all of us have a Father in heaven who loves us deeply. We are his children. He longs to provide us with knowledge, wisdom, and understanding of things beyond our wildest imaginations. And really if you believe the story of Noah(and I absolutely do!!!), we are all pretty much cousins with a common grandfather named Noah. That means your great-great-something-grandfather built a boat which housed the ancestors of every creature that you see now. He was faithful enough to listen to God, build a boat, and save his family. That is your heritage. So, if you have an absentee father, just know that you have a really good one way back when.

In closing, I am reminded of Ted Lasso. Ted struggles with being a dad who is present. He has a successful job in England, but his son is growing up in Kansas City without him. Ultimately, Ted makes the choice that we hope all dads will – he chose his son over his job and went home to raise him.

Be like Ted. Even better, be like our Father in heaven.

ProTip: If you aren’t a dad. That is ok. God has a plan for your life. You can support Dads and their kids. You can be a uncle who is present when needed. Just seek to be the man God made you to be – that is enough.

I really like this song by Cat Stevens – Father to Son. It does a great job of encapsulating the complexities and importance of being a dad and of being a son. Man, your kids are gonna grow up fast. Enjoy every minute. It’ll be gone before you know it.

And if you made it this far….here is a bonus interview w/ the creators of Ted Lasso. They talk about Ted as a dad.