How do we develop young men who possess the courage to stand up for what is right? Whew. That is not an easy answer.
In our gender neutral society, I know it is unpopular to differentiate between the sexes. I am not going to bombard you with Bible verses which provide God’s differentiation of each. If you need that proof, head to Genesis as God creates Adam and Eve…and keep reading. What I do know is that societies with strong and just men are usually pretty healthy places to live. Strong men can be found in all different shapes, colors, and sizes. Though they may have vastly different appearances, I think one common and important characteristic is that they possess is courage. They will stand and face danger when others will not.
I am not even sure this is the job of a public school. But as educators, we need to provide content which isn’t sterilized of manliness. So, maybe this directed to parents more than it is educators. How do we raise men of courage?
- School of hard knocks. Now, I am not advocating that we purposefully make life hard for our kids. However, we need to make sure that they are placed in situations where they will have face adversity. It is that adversity which develops perseverance, and in turn that perseverance which matures their faith. And faithful men will have courage, because their courage does not come from men. It comes from the one who made the sun stand still in the sky when Joshua was in battle. I think athletics is a great teacher. Athletes have to learn how to be disciplined for long periods of time. They have to be patient in order to watch that efforts bear fruit. Athletes must learn from defeat. They must learn how to handle success. They must learn to be coached. They must learn to compete, to run the race to the best of their ability. They must learn to get knocked down and get back up again. They are gonna get beat up, but they are going to learn some lessons which will guide them for a lifetime.
- Lead by example. Fathers, your sons are watching you. The men they become will be greatly influenced by you. If we want your sons to “hang in there” when times are tough, they are going to see it in their dads. Teach them compassion, mercy, and grace. Teach them how to handle conflict. Teach them how to hold their ground. But to teach them, they are going to have to see it modeled. Dads, you don’t have to be perfect. I am a huge fan of Phil Robertson of Duck Dynasty. He readily admits that he really wasn’t there for his boys when they were young. He wasn’t really there for his wife either. He was a drunk. But Phil committed his life to the Lord, and God Almighty changed him. He was made new. And his sons saw the change in their dad, and they eventually welcomed God into their own lives.
- Get them in a church which teaches the truth. Our kids can handle tough sermons. What they don’t need is a suger-coated, lesser Gospel. I think about Noah. That man lived in a world full of people who would drown due to their evil deeds. His sons were the only men allowed into the ark, because their dad(and mom) had raised them to fear God. Now admittedly, sometimes families can get sideways. Jacob’s sons sold one of their brothers into slavery! Adam’s family had some fairly significant problems – Cain. Jesse raised a king, but didn’t realize which son it was until Samuel pointed it out. Our children can handle those messages. They will grow from them, learn from them, and draw solace from them if their lives get kind of crazy. But they need to be in church, and be surrounded by a community of believers who will help grow them into men who can raise families, and men who can boldly spread the Gospel.
- Take them outdoors. I do believe that fishermen and hunters value life in ways that others don’t. Our food that is on our tables is often not seen as an animal that gave its life that we might be fed. Someone who fishes and hunts knows that price. They have seen an animal take its last breath so that they may eat. I grew up in the Boy Scouts. I have had to sit through lightning storms while on a ridge with little protection. I have built campfires, slept without tents, been soaked through the bone after weekends in non-stop rain, and traveled to leadership conferences, and worked with a team towards a goal. While scouting isn’t what it used to be, we can learn from what it was. The BSA was designed to build young men who could lead. If we had to fight another war, we would then have men who could fight that war. All of that said, I think the very best things that Scouting taught me were how to survive and how to lead. Young men today need those skills.
- Warrior Poets. I love movies. I can’t get enough of them. The end of Braveheart is maybe one of my favorites. William Wallace had been executed in defense of Scotland. Robert the Bruce (hey, GREAT first name!) marched onto the battlefield of Bannockburn with William’s sword in tow. They tossed it into the air with bagpipes bellowing in the background. “In the Year of our Lord 1314, patriots of Scotland – starving and outnumbered – charged the fields of Bannockburn. They fought like warrior poets; they fought like Scotsmen, and won their freedom.” William Wallace was a man of courage. One man stood, and others followed. We need to raise men who show courage, but even more than that, we need to raise young men who also give courage to others.
- Teach mercy. We live in a society which can be ruthless. I am guilty of that at times. I suspect many of us are. Our children are surrounded by merciless examples. We live in a society which cancels people with very little justification other than a single mistake. Showing mercy to someone who doesn’t deserve it requires immense courage. That type of courage can come only from God Almighty. It is a courage cultivated by a faith in Jesus, and only Jesus. There is a story of Iván Fernández Anaya, a cross country runner. He was running second to Abel Mutai. Mutai stopped 10 meters short of the finish line. Anaya refused to pass Mutai, but instead, with hand gestures showed Mutai that he stopped early. Anaya finished second. Anaya stated Mutai had done everything that he needed to do to win the race, and he wasn’t going to rob him of that victory. He showed mercy, when he could have won ruthlessly. That is the type of courage that we are looking for in our young people.
When a brave man takes a stand, the spines of others are often stiffened. ~ Billy Graham
